How to Win Friends
and Influence People
1.Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
2.Don't criticize, condemn or complain.
3.Give honest and sincere appreciation.
4.Arouse in the other person an eager want.
5.Six ways to make people like you
6.Become genuinely interested in other people.
8.Remember that a person's name is to that person
the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
9.Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk
10.Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
11.Make the other person feel important - and
do it sincerely.
12.Win people to your way of thinking
13.The only way to get the best of an argument
is to avoid it.
14.Show respect for the other person's opinions.
Never say, "You're wrong."
15.If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
16.Begin in a friendly way.
17.Get the other person saying "yes, yes"
18.Let the other person do a great deal of the
19.Let the other person feel that the idea is
his or hers.
20.Try honestly to see things from the other person's
point of view.
21.Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas
22.Appeal to the nobler motives.
23.Dramatize your ideas.
24.Throw down a challenge.
25.Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving
26.A leader's job often includes changing your
and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:
27.Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
28.Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
29.Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing
the other person.
30.Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
31.Let the other person save face.
32.Praise the slightest improvement and praise
Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish
in your praise."
33.Give the other person a fine reputation to
live up to.
34.Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy
35.Make the other person happy about doing the
thing you suggest.
Fundamental facts you should know about worry
If you want to avoid worry, do what Sir William
Live in "day-tight compartments. "Don't
stew about the futures. Just live each day until
The next time Trouble--with a Capital T--backs
you up in a corner, try the magic formula of Willis
"What is the worst that can possibly happen
if I can't solve my problem? "
Prepare yourself mentally to accept the worst--if
Then calmly try to improve upon the worst--which
you have already mentally agreed to accept.
Remind yourself of the exorbitant price you can
pay for worry in terms of your health. "Those
who do not know how to fight worry die young."
Basic techniques in analyzing worry
Get the facts. Remember that Dean Hawkes of Columbia
University said that "half the worry in the
world is caused by people trying to make decisions
before they have sufficient knowledge on which
to base a decision."
After carefully weighing all the facts, come to
Once a decision is carefully reached, act! Get
busy carrying out your decision--and dismiss all
anxiety about the outcome.
When you, or any of your associates, are tempted
to worry about a problem, write out and answer
the following questions:
What is the problem?
What is the cause of the problem?
What are all possible solutions?
What is the best solution?
How to break the worry habit before it breaks
Crowd worry out of your mind by keeping busy.
Plenty of action is one of the best therapies
ever devised for curing "wibber gibbers."
Don't fuss about trifles. Don't permit little
things--the mere termites of life--to ruin your
Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries.
Ask yourself: "What are the odds against
this thing's happening at all?"
Co-operate with the inevitable. If you know a
circumstance is beyond your power to change or
revise, say to yourself: "It is so; it cannot
Put a "stop-less" order on your worries.
Decide just how much anxiety a thing may be worth--and
refuse to give it anymore.
Let the past bury its dead. Don't saw sawdust.
Seven ways to cultivate a mental attitude that
will bring you peace and happiness
Let's fill our minds with thoughts of peace, courage,
health, and hope, for "our life is what our
thoughts make it."
Let's never try to get even with our enemies,
because if we do we will hurt ourselves far more
than we hurt them. Let's do as General Eisenhower
does: let's never waste a minute thinking about
people we don't like.
Instead of worrying about ingratitude, let's expect
it. Let's remember that Jesus healed ten lepers
in one day--and only one thanked Him. Why should
we expect more gratitude than Jesus got?
Let's remember that the only way to find happiness
is not to expect gratitude--but to give for the
joy of giving.
Let's remember that gratitude is a "cultivated"
trait; so if we want our children to be grateful,
we must train them to be grateful.
Count your blessings--not your troubles!
Let's not imitate others. Let's find ourselves
and be ourselves, for "envy is ignorance"
and "imitation is suicide."
When fate hands us a lemon, let's try to make
Let's forget our own unhappiness--by trying to
create a little happiness for others. "When
you are good to others, you are best to yourself."
The perfect way to conquer worry
How to keep from worrying about criticism
Unjust criticism is often a disguised compliment.
It often means that you have aroused jealousy
and envy. Remember that no one ever kicks a dead
Do the very best you can; and then put up your
old umbrella and keep the rain of criticism from
running down the back of your neck.
Let's keep a record of the fool things we have
done and criticize ourselves. Since we can't hope
to be perfect, let's do what E.H. Little did:
let's ask for unbiased, helpful, constructive
Six ways to prevent fatigue and worry and keep
your energy and spirits high
Rest before you get tired.
Learn to relax at your work.
Learn to relax at home.
Apply these four good workings habits:
Clear your desk of all papers except those relating
to the immediate problem at hand.
Do things in the order of their importance.
When you face a problem, solve it then and there
if you have the facts to make a decision.
Learn to organize, deputize, and supervise.
To prevent worry and fatigue, put enthusiasm into
Remember, no one was ever killed by lack of sleep.
It is worrying about insomnia that does the damage--not
The Quick and Easy Way
to Effective Speaking